Body based therapies were in the family, my mum was a reflexologist, my stepdad was a reiki master, and my sister is an Indian head masseuse, but I was far more interested in psychology and the mind. The idea of me spending even a penny on resourcing my body seemed like an absolute luxury and totally alien to me.  

 

Like many of us, it would take my world crashing down around me for me to even consider that I may need to do something different from what I had been doing.  

 

My sense of security was swept from under me, and I found myself asking ‘how can I provide stability for me and my son?’ 

 

I remembered how as a child I’d crawl into the dog basket and seek comfort from my dogs in my family home and at my grandma's… the warmth of their bodies against mine and the comforting smell of their breath. 

 

So, despite everyone telling me not to, I brought a dog back home for me and my son. This was the start of me doing things for myself and honouring my needs and desires, rather than taking the lead from others.  

 

The part of me that believed it was a total luxury to spend money on my needs started loosening its grip, as I realised, I needed to invest in support for myself so I could show up as the mum I wanted to be. 

 

I began having acupuncture for sciatica, but what I realised was that the safety provided by the presence of my therapist and the way they handled me with such care, gave me so much more than the physical. It was the first time in my life I’d found a human who was there for me and the first step in seeing how much of a support another human can be.  

 

Through that relationship, I learned how to ask myself what my needs were and became braver in expressing them. One day curled up in bed I asked myself what do I need? And the answer came through loud and clear from my inner child ‘I want my Daddy’.  

 

I knew I needed to say this to my dad on behalf of my inner child. When I found the courage to, we both cried and it opened a dialogue of healing, and over time forgiveness; a point I’d never imagined I’d reach. 

 

Once I was no longer focused on the past, I found I was more able to look at myself. It became very clear to me the value I was getting from the journey of reconnecting with my body and allowing myself to receive support.

 

Because I was held in such presence and had the space to speak in the sessions, I was able to carry this with me in-between the sessions. My therapist modelled a way of relating with me that I was able to adopt when relating to myself. And I began deepening my connection with my body through yoga and breathwork.  

 

It was during my first training to become a coach, working with people’s minds, that it became painfully evident how many people (including myself) needed something more. Something to help move us away from solely searching for the answer in our thoughts. The dots aligned as I realised what we needed was to get in touch with the body’s messages, feelings and sensations, which had already been so life changing for me personally.    

 

I’m so grateful to now support others to connect with their body and hold the space for it to speak through somatic coaching.